If you think this sounds like I have an overblown sense of self-importance, not only do I have decades of anecdotal evidence but the Jays didn’t just “lose” last night, they were trounced. Schooled. Clobbered. Wallupped. Shellacked. Lambasted. (it just occurred to me that I might like getting into sports, there are so many fun ways to say they lost) You’d think it was because of a series of critical errors and general all around bad playing, but no. It was me. Sorry, Jay's fans. (and you’re welcome, Royal’s fans). I won’t be mentioning sports again. Only if they win the – wait! Nope. (whew, that was close) You guys watch and let me know. I’ll be out not buying lottery tickets. I won’t buy you one.
I was also going on (and on) about the news…how I don’t watch it, how it’s all bad anyway, etc. Then people pointed out to me that there are lots of news websites out there that are only “good news”. Really? (I thought) Reeeally? (I said). So I checked a few of them out and wow! Such good news! Who knew?!
Yeah...they made me sad. Why, you ask? It's because they made me bored. Which then made me sad because it means that our culture (me) only finds bad news interesting or exciting. It didn’t make me any less sad about our culture (me) that I still kind of enjoy entertainment news. Or that they call it “news”.
I somehow ended up watching “News-anchor fails” which I found way more hilarious than I probably should have and I would happily watch the news if it was like that every night. Which made me sad again. Seems I like watching people fail. So my final decision is to just stay here with my head stuck in the sand. You guys can also give me a little head’s up if the Martians are attacking. Otherwise, I’m good. It’s quiet and I hear sea-gulls.